A New Beginning

Well, we received info on 2 children from WACAP and did not feel that we are competent enough to parent either of these special girls. All of the children WACAP has sent for us to consider (besides the child we were hoping to adopt) have had severe developmental/medical issues out of our comfort level. Consultations with the International Adoption Clinic about these children--4 of them--resulted in them expressing "extreme concern" and they were deemed "very high risk" adoptions. We pray these children will find the homes they need. There are no more children in their waiting children album left for us at this time to inquire about. Any new children they receive will have to be listed for many months before being granted a subsidy, so we have two choices: find another agency that we can afford, or resign ourselves to wait several months in the hopes that a "perfect" child will be made available soon, and then wait for that child to get a subsidy, and hope that no one else adopts them before that can happen.

Since staying with WACAP seems like a ridiculous choice at this point, we have sent in our pre-application to a new agency, Americans for International Aid and Adoption (AIAA) out of Michigan. I have heard wonderful things about them in online discussions, and they place children out of the same orphanage the child we had hoped to adopt was from.

I was considering them, when I looked at Rainbowkids.com, an online photolisting of adoptable children, and ran across an article called "Nothing Can Keep Us Down! Three babies in need of families tell us about themselves" (December 01,2007 / Teri Bell of AIAA). Here is a sweet description of 3 children all at the same orphanage in India with Spina Bifida that need homes, a 2-year old, 1-year old, and infant. The 1-year old is the child we had been pursuing at the other agency. The 2-year old sounded sweet, but a little more delayed mentally than we had hoped. Then the description of the infant:

"I'm the baby of this group and you can know me as Sweeti. I'm turning seven months old. I'm just spectacular and everyone agrees on that. Unlike my friends I still have the lump on my back that I was born with. The doctors checked me out and because I'm doing so well, they don't want to do any surgery at this time. My medical says that I have features of a myelomeningocele but someone who looked at my information in the US wonders if maybe it is really a myelocele with minimal nerve tissue involvement. As I understand it, everyone is just so happy and surprised with my development that they question the amount of spinal cord involvement. Last month when Aunty visited I was doing the same things as the other babies my age. What's so special about that? I move my arms and legs well, I'm alert, I like to smile, I play with my feet and toys, I'm growing well, I turn over, I'm vocal, my feet are ticklish and yes, my bowel and bladder habits are normal. I'm getting physical therapy too, but I really think it is because the therapist likes to play games. I do not have a listing on RainbowKids yet as I'm waiting for my paperwork to be finalized."

And the clincher:

"Each of the children above are eligible for a significant adoption grant depending upon the eligibility of the adoptive family. "

I requested information and the agency was quick to respond. Their total fee for an Indian adoption is $4,000 less than WACAP, and if we qualify for the maximum adoption grant (which I don't see why we wouldn't), the fees would be down to around $2,500, less than the $5,000 we would owe WACAP with their grant.

This child is not yet listed, because she has not been released from India for adoption. This is in the works. So, since our homestudy is done, I would hope that we would have an excellent chance of adopting her if we have got everything set up with this agency.

We pray that the closed door with the 1-year old was so that we would find this beautiful infant, and that within the next few months, we will be able to begin the process of bringing her into our family.

What a bumpy, emotional road this is! What a comfort to know that God goes before us, and somewhere at the end, is our child.

Mixed Blessings

Well, the moment of truth arrived this evening. Our WACAP worker called and notified us that "I" has been matched with the other family. This family was ready with their paperwork, and decided to adopt "I" within a couple days of getting his information. We were only a day or so behind them paperworkwise, but they are an Indian couple, so take preference in the eyes of the Indian government. We were assured that they will be an excellent family for "I'.

While this is disappointing to us, it is great news for "I", who will be soon united with his forever family and will no longer need to live in an orphanage. We are very happy for him and pray that his life will be full of blessings for himself and his new family. We pray that somehow he will be exposed to the Gospel as he grows and will live the very life we intended him to have.

So, back to the drawing board for us. WACAP will be sending us files of a few new referrals they have received in this same age range (girls). The good news is that our paperwork is ready, and as soon as we select a child, we can get him/her on hold quickly. This disappointment is unlikely to happen again.

As human beings, sometimes we think we have it all planned out. But, in times like this, we are reminded that God is in control of it all, and His plans are not necessarily what we imagine is best for us. I pray that He will continue to give us guidance as we review these other children, and that one of them will come to be our child. God often has bigger dreams for us than we would ever have imagined.

WACAP approval

We received word tonight (still business hours in Seattle) from WACAP that our homestudy was approved and we are now officially in the India program. This is a great step!! We are supposed to be contacted by the India program shortly. I hope that we will be able to get "I" on hold within a couple weeks. Based on other WACAP families' timelines, this is possible...but with the Thanksgiving break next week, I'm not holding my breath.

Good news/ Bad news

I heard from our WACAP representative today, and she had mixed news. The good news is that she received the draft of our homestudy today from LSS. Now she can look it over and make sure it has all the India-required details. If it is ok, then LSS can send them a notarized copy for them to approve. Once it is approved by WACAP, we can put "I" on hold, so no other family can work toward his adoption. The bad news is that she informed us that another family now is also interested in the child we hope to adopt.

So, I have no idea if this family will decide to keep on pursuing him, or if they are further along in the process than us and will become his parents. They could have just requested his medical info or they could already have their homestudy approved. The first ones to sign the "hold" papers gets the chance to adopt him. Of course, the orphanage has to approve us, as well as India (CARA), so there could be a breakdown anywhere along the track. I know God will provide "I" with the parents he has intended and I am trying to have peace in that. Easier said than done!!!

Good news and bad news....nervous news.....life, huh?

USCIS update

We received word today from our local agency (LSS) that we're allowed as clergy to include allowances (housing, car, etc.) as income--I knew this but SHE had to know it--so we're likely ok in the immigration department. We need letters from our employers explaining our income situation and to fill out the long form. Other than that, there is still no news on our progress. LSS is supposed to be sending our homestudy to WACAP for approval so that we can put "I" on hold...so no other family can see his info...and it's taking awhile. Maybe God thinks I need to learn patience???

We had a great time last month visiting friends of ours who have a baby a few days younger than "I". It was fun to see what she could do and make mental notes for comparison with the developmental info we have on "I". What a precious girl!!

Kids at pumpkin patch in October

Paperchase!

Adoption news from LSS, where our homestudy agency/social worker is working to get us USCIS (used to be INS before 9/11 when it was put under the Department of Homeland Security) approval. This is basically the U.S. gvt's way of assuring another country that we are financially capable of supporting a child and that we aren't criminals. (We were fingerprinted by them back in July and so the criminal part is ok....no surprise!!) It also allows us to apply to be "immigration sponsors" for a foreign citizen to come to this country. Because my husband is a member of the clergy and our taxes are done differently than most 9-5 jobs, our 1040 does not show accurately our income. (I also had a substantial raise in pay in January '07 when I was promoted from city treasurer to clerk, and that change is not on our 2006 taxes.) As a result, USCIS needs further proof of our financial situation and that requires a bunch more forms. We need to prove that we are at or above the 125% of the poverty line, which for a family of 5 (including child) is about $30,000/yr. So, this social worker is trying to figure out how we do that.

So far we've done tons of paperwork varying from: name, address, age, etc., to "how do you feel about........" sappy questions about our families, emotions, childhoods, children, views on race, culture, adoption, etc. from 2 agencies (2 applications plus homestudy stuff). We've had medical exams, local and federal fingerprints (local had to be done inside the jail....a bit wierd...and federal involved an overnight stay in Fargo because our appt. was at 8 a.m.), 2 days of adoption education in Minneapolis, visit to LSS office in Moorhead, home visit (clean that house!!), a "parenting resource plan" which involved contacting community resources- educational, medical, emotional and spiritual-so we would know where to go for problems that may ensue, several contacts with the International Adoption Clinic doctors at the U of M regarding interpretation of medical reports received on "I" throughout these months, gotten our pictures taken and applied for (and received) our renewed passports, requested copies of our marriage license, and probably lots more I've repressed. And sadly, there is much more ahead of us than behind us. We must get this 12-page USCIS form off, as well as our entire dossier which will be sent to India. I still need to order more copies of our birth certificates, get letters from our bank, jobs and doctors (again), and who knows what all!! And yes, all this is worlds better than vomiting 24/7.

I am still hoping to have the child we are trying to be matched with on hold for us by Thanksgiving. This is not likely, but would certainly be something to be thankful for! It will be wonderful to know that our agency will not show him to any other families.

Should "I" be put on hold for us, we would then need to be approved by the orphanage. After that, we send our dossier (lots of documents) to India. They would process it and give us NOC (no objection certificate) that shows that India approves of the match. Then there are 3 court dates that he must get through, and he needs a visa....then travel! India is trying to make this process much quicker, so we'll see how that goes!!

If anyone is a Seinfeld fan, "Serenity Now!!"