Bison and Dinosaurs

After we had returned to the hotel from the zoo, we showered off the zoo grime and found a local Indian restaurant to dine at. Those of us who like and appreciate Indian food really enjoyed our meal, and those who don't really care for it did a good job of being polite. It was fun to talk about the food we had in India and learn more about the Yeast and Carr families. After another round in the pool and all the excitement that goes with that, it was off to bed.

The next morning, the Tague family arrived, with a bandaged-up and groggy Nisha. We grabbed a few of those hard-cooked-egg-things and drove to Big Bone Lick State Park which was only 15 or so miles away in a scenic, rural area. Wikipedia describes it as being located between Beaver Lick, KY and Rabbit Hash, KY. So, we drove by some culturally different (see how a Scandinavian/Minnesotan can spin it?) names of businesses and types of dwellings on the way there.

This park is known as the "birthplace of modern paleontology" and is rich in fossil history, but we primarily went there to see the bison herd. They were feeding when we got there, so we didn't have to hike exceedingly far before we caught up with the group. It was far enough for all the small feet walking with us, though. The herd included several babies, including one which was just days old. The kids seemed to be entertained for awhile watching the herd, especially the young ones.

Bailley, Anju and Manu get a closer look

Tague, Carr and Stafford kids

The girls

Finally seeing all the Ashraya kids together was just surreal. I remember full well sitting on the floor of the playroom at Ashraya with a hesitant Anju on my lap, reading Nisha, Bailley and another child (Vee!) a board book about zoo animals. I remember helping Bailley build a tower out of blocks while Anju pouted in the corner, not wanting me, but jealous of me paying attention to Bailley. I remember helping them get their shoes on and watching them play on the playground together- especially Nisha and Bailley--while a sleepy baby Manu snoozed in his crib. And now to see them with parents (siblings) and clothes that fit with sparkly eyes and smiles on their faces (even on the groggy one) was at some moments just breathtaking if you really thought about it. So, I tried not to so we could just enjoy the moment and make memories and keep having fun; because mixed with the joy of the realization of the situation is a lot of difficult stuff too.

We bought the obligatory post cards and souvenirs and then drove back to the hotel so that the Carr family could check out. We then all proceeded to have pizza together before Jenn and her crew had to leave. We had an employee from the restaurant take our picture as we said goodbye.

The boys hanging out at the pizza place

The four Ashraya friends

The Carr, Tague, Stafford and Yeast families

The remaining 3 families split up for the afternoon, with plans to reunite at the pool in the evening. Our family and the Tague family chose to go to the Creation Museum, and the Yeasts went shopping.

All of my family enjoyed the museum at least some of the time--although it was a lot of reading for the little ones. It was something we had desired to see since it opened, but didn't really imagine it being an immediate reality--so it was wonderful to find ourselves actually there.

Kids at the entrance to the Creation Museum

Walking into the museum

Solveig found a friend!

Our friend, Martin Luther

Jonah walks into the Creation

Be careful, Solveig!

Jonah tames the dino

We enjoyed a supper on our own and met up with the Tague and Yeast families at the pool where Jeff, Leslie, Brooke and I were able to visit for awhile. Shawn and Aaron were child care martyrs, and I really appreciate them allowing their wives to visit.

Anju had really scraped up the top of one of her feet in the kiddie pool the night before, so I didn't let her swim. She was supposed to have been wearing swim shoes in the pool, as kids with SB can't feel their feet as well and tend to scrape them up on the bottom of the pool. Well, she'd never been in a kiddie pool before, just had an adult carry her around in the big pool, so it had never been an issue before. Oops. As I speak, one of the 3 abrasions still hasn't healed. I've since read that another problem is it takes a lot longer for the injuries to the foot to heal as the blood circulation isn't as good there. I'd say! So, a lesson learned. The only good thing was that she didn't seem to feel anything, just freaked out about all the blood that continued to appear day after day. She quite enjoyed getting a Kai-Lan or Strawberry Shortcake Band-Aid in addition to the huge "Mama" Band-Aid I covered her whole foot with to try to contain the "swim owie".

A bit too late, I brought Solveig and Jonah back to the room from the pool and crawled into bed beside a deeply breathing and thoroughly asleep Anju.

Lions and Tigers and Bears, Oh my!

We woke up Friday morning and headed down to the breakfast area to eat a bite and meet our group. The Carr family was already there. We tried to make the best of the all-carb breakfast options and had a seat. Now I'm going to admit, this isn't the worst hotel I've stayed at. However, I think the people surrounding me just made me so uncomfortable that it seemed that way. For example, the hotel worker manning the breakfast bar made me uneasy. She looked like she was one of those women who was only in her 40's, but who had had such a tough life she looked like she was in her sixties. I'm not sure if she had all her teeth or not because she never smiled. She looked as though we were all angering her by eating breakfast. She scowled at us. The breakfast area was not set up very well, so there were lots of people waiting and milling around while their bagels, toast or waffles were cooking. There were families who came in and had bowls of chocolate mini-donuts and fruit loops for breakfast. Really? I'm jumping ahead here, but on Sunday morning a "rural" looking woman asked me why there were eggs on the counter. I told her they were for eating. She said, "Are they hard cooked or something?". Yeah. She didn't know about eggs. She said she thought she should try that and told her husband about it. "They've got hard cooked eggs you can eat over here!" I'm thinking in retrospect it is experiences like this that brought the whole hotel down. I realized the pictures online had no PEOPLE in them. Aha!

The Yeast family arrived and ate with us, and in short time we realized that the Tague family was not on its way. Instead, Nisha was having surgery. We hoped they would be able to join us the next day, but admittedly it didn't sound good. We decided to carry on and go to the Cincinnati Zoo.

After a period of time sitting on the highway in traffic, we arrived at the zoo and decided to go look at the elephants first. They were having a "Meet the Zookeeper" talk at the time, which we stopped to watch. They were supposed to be hosing off the elephants, but took their sweet time bringing them out. After we had waited more than 5 minutes and learned more about the zookeeper than we really cared to, the elephants finally came within view and the intern started hosing one off while the zookeeper told us about her.

Within a minute, there was a downpour of rain. Rain in sheets. We were soaked. We sent the men back to the cars to get more umbrellas, and we huddled underneath the 2 we had with us (about a dozen people). Jeff pointed out later that there was a large zoo umbrella only feet away from us we could have gone under. That's exactly my luck. Bad news: we were soaked and our maps were ruined. Good news: we enjoyed a day at the zoo that wasn't stiflingly hot for once.

Seconds before the downpour, some Stafford and Carr kids watch the elephant get a shower.

Jonah checks out the polar bear with buddy, Manu

Our little helper :-)

Sol & Bailley

Friendly peacock

Anju and Manu enjoy the zoo

Three friends reunited,

splashing in puddles,

and off exploring their world together.

A brief disclaimer from a Northener

Jeff and Leslie Yeast are from Kentucky and are not hillbillies. Far from it! The hillbillies from the "Beverly Hillbillies" show were apparently from the Ozarks of NE Oklahoma. Who knew? (Wikipedia, of course!) So, perhaps there were many visitors from the Ozarks at our hotel. And also at our campground in Mammoth Cave which also happens to be in Ky.

Actually, Kentucky is a very beautiful state and we encourage all our friends from MN to pay it a visit. Just not this hotel.

The story continues: Lincoln and the hillbillies

DAY 3- JULY 8- MILEAGE 804

We woke up very early to have as much time in Springfield as possible, yet still make it to N. Ky by dinnertime. As we hooked up Scotty, we noticed the left taillight wasn't working. Sure enough, a light bulb was not only out, but the glass of the bulb was broken. So, we loaded up the car and headed into the nearest town (Rochester, IL) to find an auto parts shop that was open at 7:15 a.m. We crossed under the overpass of the highway and decided to grab some coffee (adults) and french toast sticks (kids) at BK which we could see on the edge of town. We were on vacation, right? Lo and behold, what is across the street from BK?? An Auto Zone store, which was open and already attracting customers. So, Shawn replaced the bulb, we guzzled our BK Joe to try to gain some consciousness, and we aimed for Springfield.

Shawn getting Scotty repaired

It wasn't hard to locate our destination due to plentiful signs. We arrived at Lincoln's Home and quickly entered the visitor's center to get our tour tickets. This home and surrounding buildings now owned by the National Park Service was a highlight of our trip. The home still had much of the Lincoln's original furniture, and the entrance was free (except for $4 for parking- $2 for each of the parking spots we needed). The kids were giddy to think of their favorite president sitting at THAT desk or his boys playing with THOSE ACTUAL marbles. When we went upstairs, we got to touch the original banister that Lincoln's family had---and my children savored each moment they touched it. I know, nerds.

Solveig takes a turn carrying Anju

Abe's desk

Jonah excitedly feels the Lincoln family's banister

Us at Lincoln's Home

After our tour, we left and went to Lincoln's tomb in a nearby cemetery. It was a large monument at the end of the road, past the other gravestones. Signs asked for quiet and reverence (however Anju can't read) and it did feel overwhelmingly sad there. Inside the tomb was first a small rotunda with a small reproduction of the Lincoln Memorial. Then, a circular hallway led past the beautiful words of his obituary to his large tombstone, surrounded by flags. The opposite wall had the names and dates of his wife and sons who are buried there. On a distant wall was the name and dates of his oldest son, who is not buried there, but in Arlington.

Tomb exterior

Inside Lincoln's tomb

We drove through more downpours in Illinois, across Indiana (where some had reported funnel clouds), and into Northern Kentucky to our hotel. We arrived about 6 Central time, which was now 7 in the Eastern time zone. The room was clean, but had a distinctive "old" smell to it. And, the air conditioner seemed to be having trouble. The carpet appeared to be about my age. However, the bathroom was shiny and it had a nice newish fridge and microwave in it, so I figured it was worth the $50-some a night. Besides, it had a great pool, right?

Are the Staffords here??

None of the Ashraya families we were meeting appeared to be there. The front desk said they hadn't arrived. I was beginning to think that maybe Shawn was right--maybe they were my "imaginary friends"? Maybe driving 20 hours across the country to meet people you met over the internet was a bad idea? It was all starting to sound like an episode of Dateline. Shawn thought maybe we should leave a message at the front desk to let the others know we were there. I figured a vintage camper in the parking lot with MN plates would likely be all the notice they needed. We had the cell numbers for 2 of the 3 families, and the one that we reached said she wouldn't be there until very late. So, we ordered pizza in our room and went to the pool for swimming.

At the pool we immediately noticed a definite "KY flair". Shawn started calling Solveig "Elly May" which was extremely short-lived. I didn't hear anyone reference the pool as a "cement pond", but based on appearances I fully expected to. Proper pool attire has a different definition with many of the hotel guests at that "fine" establishment. Those who had proper swimsuits did not apparently try them on before purchasing them, as let's just say they didn't quite fit the way you need a swimsuit to fit.

Eventually, The Yeast family arrived in the pool area and we were able to visit with them until about 10:30. Jonah (7 1/2) and Manu (2) hit it off right away and had a great time playing together. Manu was just slightly taller than Anju, although being a year younger. We decided to meet at breakfast the next morning to figure out what to do the next day, as the Carrs weren't arriving until midnight and we hadn't gotten a hold of the Tague family yet. Hmmmmm. :-)

8 states, 11 days---the insanity begins!

Of course, our trip has to begin with sitting

on the freeway in construction traffic.

(Maple Grove, MN- Minneapolis area)

DAY ONE- JULY 6: We got going around 7:30 a.m. After conquering the thrills of construction, potty breaks and the challenging IA/WI bluff area topography, we arrived at our first stop, Pike's Peak State Park around 8:30 p.m. I made some hot dogs on the stove in the camper, as it was too late to start a fire. It was a long day of driving-- 480 miles.

Scotty at Pikes Peak State Park in Northeastern Iowa

DAY TWO- JULY 7: We awoke to the pitter-patter of rain on Scotty's roof. Around 7, I headed to the bathhouse to shower. The early morning, mid-morning, afternoon and evening forecasts on the weather radio broadcasting in the bathhouse were the same: showers and thunderstorms. Great! We drove over to Effigy Mounds National Monument where the precipitation changed from light rain to a heavy downpour.

Because of the weather, we were unable to go out and look at any mounds. They all involved at least a half mile hike, and it was raining in sheets. So, we watched the PC movie in the visitor's center, and Solveig and Jonah worked on Jr. Ranger badges by walking around the museum reading about the mounds and native life in the Mississippi region and doing activities in their workbooks. Anju worked on her constipation problem. I visited the restroom 5 times with her in the 1 1/2 hour that we were there. So, I think this will have to be an attraction that we visit again sometime--maybe with some prunes.

Solveig receives her Jr. Ranger badge from the park ranger

We headed back to the campground with our two newly-badged junior park rangers, and hooked up Scotty. I was glad that all we had to do was attach the camper to the car, pull the electric plug and lock up instead of stand out in the rain to disassemble anything. We dug out our Iowa and Illinois maps, and followed the Trip Tik to Springfield, IL.

The weather continued to be an issue as we drove. After a hiatus from the rain somewhere in Iowa and a nice picnic lunch, we entered the Quad Cities area where we needed to switch roads. When the turn came up (in Illinois), the rainstorm suddenly got very bad--with practically no visibility at all. Just when the downpour started, a construction worker ran right into the lane next to us to retrieve a construction cone and scared the you-know-what out of me. Did I mention we were in a construction zone? I was going 35 mph and still could not see the road. The car and Scotty slid around on large pools of water in the roadway. I finally had to pull over on the freeway to avoid a complete emotional breakdown. After sitting a few minutes, it lightened up enough to get back on and take our exit. At the next major town, Pieoria, it started raining hard again--but not quite as bad this time. I feared that "Amy's law" was beginning to take effect: If it can go wrong, it will, and it will be Amy's fault for planning it.

Pic taken from the bathhouse at Sangchris Lake State Park in Rochester, IL

There were about 5 campers in the whole campground,

each about 15 campsites apart from each other.

However, we found the state park "near" Springfield Il to be a rural refuge and free of rain. We grilled hot dogs and stuck a can of green beans in the fire to go with them. S'mores after supper made the stress of the drive lessen. Walking back from the bathhouse and watching the bunnies hop around the campsite and the fireflies dance in the bushes reminded me why we camp in the summer---we get a chance to stop and watch the smallest blessings of God's creation---and shower with our sandals on.

Be it ever so humble, there's no place like home!

Home sweet home! We arrived back in Lengby last night around 8 p.m. ---back to more reasonable temperatures and humidity levels (in the 100's in the St. Louis area), back to the familiar buzz of mosquitos, back to the empty fridge with only condiments to offer, back to the sad meows of our kitties, back to our own spacious beds, and back to work.

Since we've got an 11-day (+ 2800 mile) story to tell, I'm going to work on it day by day here on the blog in my "free" time. Ha! For a sneak peak at our Ashraya reunion through the eyes of the other families, check out the Carr, Yeast and Tague blogs. We miss you guys already!

Please stay tuned for our adventures---Can a hotel really be so bad that camping in a basic state park campground looks like paradise (Brooke gave it one star, and she was very generous)? What happens when a child's flip flop breaks at a major attraction? How many times did Anju "have to go potty"? What is proper swimming attire in Northern Kentucky? Is KFC just FC in Kentucky? How quickly can you find an auto parts store in Rochester, IL? I know---the suspense is KILLING you!

For now, I've got half-hungry, half-sleepy kids to feed ketchup, beet pickles and olive oil to (just kidding, Mom!) and a camper to unpack before the rain/thunderstorm/severe weather arrives mid-morning. Enjoy this in the meantime, and you'll feel like you were on our trip with us!

Culture Keeping

I just finished reading a book (I reviewed here) about the phenomenon of "culture keeping". For the purposes of this book, "culture keeping" is the act of a white mother in the home trying to maintain the birth culture of her internationally adopted child. The author's research compared Chinese and Russian adoptive homes. Reading this presented several interesting facts, and subsequent questions:

Facts (from sociological survey):

1) The darker-skinned the person, the more "culture" (in quotes because it is a social idea about culture and not really culture itself) society believes them to have. White people have the least "culture" and it is not so important for them to embrace whatever their ethnicity is. Whites can be ethnic on certain holidays, like St. Patrick's Day or Christmas, but are supposed to be just American the rest of the year.

2) The children adopted from China were easily spotted as adopted in public, and were much more encouraged to embrace their birth culture. The children from Russia could often pass for biological in public, and far less mothers encouraged them to learn/practice being Russian.

3) Conversely, more Russian children's parents kept their Russian given names, or named them other Russian names to honor their heritage. Most Chinese adoptees were given new, American names so that they wouldn't "stand out".

4) Adoptive mothers tend to seek out new immigrants from their child's birth country to assist them in learning traditional culture for their adopted child, instead of from 3rd or 4th generation Chinese or Russian Americans who have assimilated into American culture.

5) African American mothers in the U.S. (parenting their own biological children) have strategies used when raising a minority child in a majority community which would be very beneficial to cross-racial/cultural adoptive families. However, this is not in any adoption literature.

6) White mothers don't know anything (usually) about their child's birth culture, yet are forced to suddenly become experts, giving presentations at school, and teaching their child what it is to be Chinese or Russian. They aren't Chinese or Russian and have no innate knowledge to pass on.

7) The "adoption industry" takes advantage of the monetary resources of the white, middle class adoptive family (who obviously was loaded enough to adopt), and encourages families to include ethnic/cultural traditions in their families for their own financial gain.

Questions:

1) Should we be "culture keeping"? Are we doing it because it's the best for our child? The best for us? What society tells us to do?

2) Are our adopted kids (my family for example) Indian Americans? Is our whole family German-Scandinavian-Indian American even though the individuals in the family would never describe themselves as that?

3) Do we truly see our dark-skinned children as needing an element of "culture" in their lives more than our light-skinned children?

Any thoughts?