The story continues: Lincoln and the hillbillies

DAY 3- JULY 8- MILEAGE 804

We woke up very early to have as much time in Springfield as possible, yet still make it to N. Ky by dinnertime. As we hooked up Scotty, we noticed the left taillight wasn't working. Sure enough, a light bulb was not only out, but the glass of the bulb was broken. So, we loaded up the car and headed into the nearest town (Rochester, IL) to find an auto parts shop that was open at 7:15 a.m. We crossed under the overpass of the highway and decided to grab some coffee (adults) and french toast sticks (kids) at BK which we could see on the edge of town. We were on vacation, right? Lo and behold, what is across the street from BK?? An Auto Zone store, which was open and already attracting customers. So, Shawn replaced the bulb, we guzzled our BK Joe to try to gain some consciousness, and we aimed for Springfield.

Shawn getting Scotty repaired

It wasn't hard to locate our destination due to plentiful signs. We arrived at Lincoln's Home and quickly entered the visitor's center to get our tour tickets. This home and surrounding buildings now owned by the National Park Service was a highlight of our trip. The home still had much of the Lincoln's original furniture, and the entrance was free (except for $4 for parking- $2 for each of the parking spots we needed). The kids were giddy to think of their favorite president sitting at THAT desk or his boys playing with THOSE ACTUAL marbles. When we went upstairs, we got to touch the original banister that Lincoln's family had---and my children savored each moment they touched it. I know, nerds.

Solveig takes a turn carrying Anju

Abe's desk

Jonah excitedly feels the Lincoln family's banister

Us at Lincoln's Home

After our tour, we left and went to Lincoln's tomb in a nearby cemetery. It was a large monument at the end of the road, past the other gravestones. Signs asked for quiet and reverence (however Anju can't read) and it did feel overwhelmingly sad there. Inside the tomb was first a small rotunda with a small reproduction of the Lincoln Memorial. Then, a circular hallway led past the beautiful words of his obituary to his large tombstone, surrounded by flags. The opposite wall had the names and dates of his wife and sons who are buried there. On a distant wall was the name and dates of his oldest son, who is not buried there, but in Arlington.

Tomb exterior

Inside Lincoln's tomb

We drove through more downpours in Illinois, across Indiana (where some had reported funnel clouds), and into Northern Kentucky to our hotel. We arrived about 6 Central time, which was now 7 in the Eastern time zone. The room was clean, but had a distinctive "old" smell to it. And, the air conditioner seemed to be having trouble. The carpet appeared to be about my age. However, the bathroom was shiny and it had a nice newish fridge and microwave in it, so I figured it was worth the $50-some a night. Besides, it had a great pool, right?

Are the Staffords here??

None of the Ashraya families we were meeting appeared to be there. The front desk said they hadn't arrived. I was beginning to think that maybe Shawn was right--maybe they were my "imaginary friends"? Maybe driving 20 hours across the country to meet people you met over the internet was a bad idea? It was all starting to sound like an episode of Dateline. Shawn thought maybe we should leave a message at the front desk to let the others know we were there. I figured a vintage camper in the parking lot with MN plates would likely be all the notice they needed. We had the cell numbers for 2 of the 3 families, and the one that we reached said she wouldn't be there until very late. So, we ordered pizza in our room and went to the pool for swimming.

At the pool we immediately noticed a definite "KY flair". Shawn started calling Solveig "Elly May" which was extremely short-lived. I didn't hear anyone reference the pool as a "cement pond", but based on appearances I fully expected to. Proper pool attire has a different definition with many of the hotel guests at that "fine" establishment. Those who had proper swimsuits did not apparently try them on before purchasing them, as let's just say they didn't quite fit the way you need a swimsuit to fit.

Eventually, The Yeast family arrived in the pool area and we were able to visit with them until about 10:30. Jonah (7 1/2) and Manu (2) hit it off right away and had a great time playing together. Manu was just slightly taller than Anju, although being a year younger. We decided to meet at breakfast the next morning to figure out what to do the next day, as the Carrs weren't arriving until midnight and we hadn't gotten a hold of the Tague family yet. Hmmmmm. :-)

8 states, 11 days---the insanity begins!

Of course, our trip has to begin with sitting

on the freeway in construction traffic.

(Maple Grove, MN- Minneapolis area)

DAY ONE- JULY 6: We got going around 7:30 a.m. After conquering the thrills of construction, potty breaks and the challenging IA/WI bluff area topography, we arrived at our first stop, Pike's Peak State Park around 8:30 p.m. I made some hot dogs on the stove in the camper, as it was too late to start a fire. It was a long day of driving-- 480 miles.

Scotty at Pikes Peak State Park in Northeastern Iowa

DAY TWO- JULY 7: We awoke to the pitter-patter of rain on Scotty's roof. Around 7, I headed to the bathhouse to shower. The early morning, mid-morning, afternoon and evening forecasts on the weather radio broadcasting in the bathhouse were the same: showers and thunderstorms. Great! We drove over to Effigy Mounds National Monument where the precipitation changed from light rain to a heavy downpour.

Because of the weather, we were unable to go out and look at any mounds. They all involved at least a half mile hike, and it was raining in sheets. So, we watched the PC movie in the visitor's center, and Solveig and Jonah worked on Jr. Ranger badges by walking around the museum reading about the mounds and native life in the Mississippi region and doing activities in their workbooks. Anju worked on her constipation problem. I visited the restroom 5 times with her in the 1 1/2 hour that we were there. So, I think this will have to be an attraction that we visit again sometime--maybe with some prunes.

Solveig receives her Jr. Ranger badge from the park ranger

We headed back to the campground with our two newly-badged junior park rangers, and hooked up Scotty. I was glad that all we had to do was attach the camper to the car, pull the electric plug and lock up instead of stand out in the rain to disassemble anything. We dug out our Iowa and Illinois maps, and followed the Trip Tik to Springfield, IL.

The weather continued to be an issue as we drove. After a hiatus from the rain somewhere in Iowa and a nice picnic lunch, we entered the Quad Cities area where we needed to switch roads. When the turn came up (in Illinois), the rainstorm suddenly got very bad--with practically no visibility at all. Just when the downpour started, a construction worker ran right into the lane next to us to retrieve a construction cone and scared the you-know-what out of me. Did I mention we were in a construction zone? I was going 35 mph and still could not see the road. The car and Scotty slid around on large pools of water in the roadway. I finally had to pull over on the freeway to avoid a complete emotional breakdown. After sitting a few minutes, it lightened up enough to get back on and take our exit. At the next major town, Pieoria, it started raining hard again--but not quite as bad this time. I feared that "Amy's law" was beginning to take effect: If it can go wrong, it will, and it will be Amy's fault for planning it.

Pic taken from the bathhouse at Sangchris Lake State Park in Rochester, IL

There were about 5 campers in the whole campground,

each about 15 campsites apart from each other.

However, we found the state park "near" Springfield Il to be a rural refuge and free of rain. We grilled hot dogs and stuck a can of green beans in the fire to go with them. S'mores after supper made the stress of the drive lessen. Walking back from the bathhouse and watching the bunnies hop around the campsite and the fireflies dance in the bushes reminded me why we camp in the summer---we get a chance to stop and watch the smallest blessings of God's creation---and shower with our sandals on.

Be it ever so humble, there's no place like home!

Home sweet home! We arrived back in Lengby last night around 8 p.m. ---back to more reasonable temperatures and humidity levels (in the 100's in the St. Louis area), back to the familiar buzz of mosquitos, back to the empty fridge with only condiments to offer, back to the sad meows of our kitties, back to our own spacious beds, and back to work.

Since we've got an 11-day (+ 2800 mile) story to tell, I'm going to work on it day by day here on the blog in my "free" time. Ha! For a sneak peak at our Ashraya reunion through the eyes of the other families, check out the Carr, Yeast and Tague blogs. We miss you guys already!

Please stay tuned for our adventures---Can a hotel really be so bad that camping in a basic state park campground looks like paradise (Brooke gave it one star, and she was very generous)? What happens when a child's flip flop breaks at a major attraction? How many times did Anju "have to go potty"? What is proper swimming attire in Northern Kentucky? Is KFC just FC in Kentucky? How quickly can you find an auto parts store in Rochester, IL? I know---the suspense is KILLING you!

For now, I've got half-hungry, half-sleepy kids to feed ketchup, beet pickles and olive oil to (just kidding, Mom!) and a camper to unpack before the rain/thunderstorm/severe weather arrives mid-morning. Enjoy this in the meantime, and you'll feel like you were on our trip with us!

Culture Keeping

I just finished reading a book (I reviewed here) about the phenomenon of "culture keeping". For the purposes of this book, "culture keeping" is the act of a white mother in the home trying to maintain the birth culture of her internationally adopted child. The author's research compared Chinese and Russian adoptive homes. Reading this presented several interesting facts, and subsequent questions:

Facts (from sociological survey):

1) The darker-skinned the person, the more "culture" (in quotes because it is a social idea about culture and not really culture itself) society believes them to have. White people have the least "culture" and it is not so important for them to embrace whatever their ethnicity is. Whites can be ethnic on certain holidays, like St. Patrick's Day or Christmas, but are supposed to be just American the rest of the year.

2) The children adopted from China were easily spotted as adopted in public, and were much more encouraged to embrace their birth culture. The children from Russia could often pass for biological in public, and far less mothers encouraged them to learn/practice being Russian.

3) Conversely, more Russian children's parents kept their Russian given names, or named them other Russian names to honor their heritage. Most Chinese adoptees were given new, American names so that they wouldn't "stand out".

4) Adoptive mothers tend to seek out new immigrants from their child's birth country to assist them in learning traditional culture for their adopted child, instead of from 3rd or 4th generation Chinese or Russian Americans who have assimilated into American culture.

5) African American mothers in the U.S. (parenting their own biological children) have strategies used when raising a minority child in a majority community which would be very beneficial to cross-racial/cultural adoptive families. However, this is not in any adoption literature.

6) White mothers don't know anything (usually) about their child's birth culture, yet are forced to suddenly become experts, giving presentations at school, and teaching their child what it is to be Chinese or Russian. They aren't Chinese or Russian and have no innate knowledge to pass on.

7) The "adoption industry" takes advantage of the monetary resources of the white, middle class adoptive family (who obviously was loaded enough to adopt), and encourages families to include ethnic/cultural traditions in their families for their own financial gain.

Questions:

1) Should we be "culture keeping"? Are we doing it because it's the best for our child? The best for us? What society tells us to do?

2) Are our adopted kids (my family for example) Indian Americans? Is our whole family German-Scandinavian-Indian American even though the individuals in the family would never describe themselves as that?

3) Do we truly see our dark-skinned children as needing an element of "culture" in their lives more than our light-skinned children?

Any thoughts?

Pooped!

We have been shuffling around like crazy lately. We got the older 2 kids in their grandparents'/auntie's care, so I've had almost a week of being the parent to only one toddler. Today we're leaving for Mankato for synod convention, so we've been packing and taking care of business before we leave---Shawn also has Bible camp 2 days after we get back, and then after Bible camp we're leaving on a 10-day trip to Cincinnati, so he had many shut-in calls to make before leaving. One member took an unexpected turn for the worst, so we're praying that Shawn is not needed while we're gone. We got the title/license for the new camper, which we're bringing home on Friday. I cleaned out a garage stall to make room for it. And, no one wants to come home to a messy house, so we had to do some cleaning/vacuuming/etc. Of course the recent storms/tornadoes left water in my basement, so I had some piles of laundry that I had not planned on doing before leaving that had to be done because they were wet.

In one moment of exhaustion yesterday, I fell on the couch and said, "Mama's pooped!" Anju came over to my rescue and asked if I needed one of her "pooping" gummies to help my "owie poop". She had just taken a fiber supplement an hour or two earlier to help with her constipation problems. Uff da!

Then in the bathtub, this exchange:

Anju: "I no want be born India anymore."
Amy: "Oh? Where do you want to be from?"
Anju: " I want be from Tsina."
Amy: "China?"
Anju: "Yes, Andu be Kai-Lan."

So, instead of having some adoption-related identity stress, my daughter desires to be a Chinese cartoon character. THAT I can handle.

Now I'm off to make sandwiches to eat for lunch when we hop in the car after church out of the homemade, organic bread I bought from my Russian friend, Natasha, yesterday at the farmer's market. I just didn't find time to make bread yesterday!

Happy Campers!

Due to a childhood full of wonderful camping memories, I've been wanting to buy a camper for some time now. I always wanted a tin can or teardrop trailer with shiny, aluminum sides like Mickey and Minnie Mouse had---and this comes pretty close. It's a 1977 Serro Scotty Sportsman--- and weighing under 1,000 pounds, it should be a do-able tow with our station wagon.

Last weekend I picked up our new camper from it's previous owner in Viroqua, WI (SW WI not far from La Crosse) and brought it to my parents' driveway in Monticello, MN with the help of my parents and brother. Solveig, my dad, my brother and I made the trip, while my mom entertained Jonah and Anju.

We had to stop a couple times at Fleet Farm to get some needed supplies (new chains, lock, towing ball, etc.) but it looks like a great starter camper for my family. I'm hoping to get it polished up and make a few improvements before our first major camping trip---but the kids and I tried it out and really enjoyed it even as-is. Shawn and I will hopefully be able to bring it the rest of the way home in a couple days. He's anxious to see it!

Thanks Mom and Dad for all the wonderful trips we took in our camper-- Colorado, Mt. Rushmore, Yellowstone, of course our regular campout at Pathfinder Village near Hinckley, MN, and all the other places we went. I'm looking forward to making the same types of memories with my kids!

More spring pics

Solveig at her piano recital

Jonah's classroom play: the Big, Bad Wolf from Little Red Riding Hood

Anju admires herself at David's bridal while trying on a dress for her aunt's wedding

Pic sent from the adoption study of our last session